My Notebook

I cannot believe that it has literally been over three weeks since I have posted anything! Craziness . . . The need to do so has sat repeatedly at the back of mind, and repeatedly it has been shelved because of so many other pressing concerns that surround any typical mother of young children. You know the list:

• Laundry
• Cleaning
• Cooking
• Teaching kids to clean
• Practicing
• Reading with the kids
• Getting to all the end-of-the-year school programs
• Birthday cards/gifts
• Laundry
• Weeding/mowing the lawn
• Soccer games
• Dance classes, Music classes, Chinese classes
• Fitting in individual time with each of the kids
• Planning out meals
• Grocery shopping
• Planning out summer schedules
• Organizing playdates
• Dentist/doctor appointments
• Mothers' Day gifts
• By the way, did I mention laundry? (Made worse of course by Sassy's insistence on wearing at least three different dresses/outfits per day).
• Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. (I envision the adults in Peanuts here, cause that's how I feel even looking at this list).

Sometimes what requires my time is enough to make me wacky, and I wonder how to fit all of it in with some sort of serenity. Then, when I allow myself to take a giant breath, I remember that there is indeed someone who has the capacity to help me.

There is a scripture that reads: Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good . . .

I believe that there is more wisdom in that statement than meets the eye.

Think about it. If one truly believes that God lives, that we are His children, and that He absolutely loves us, then it stands to reason that He is indeed willing to guide us in even the tiny particulars.

And with that in mind, lately I have decided to take Him at His word.

For the last couple of weeks, each morning starts off with the same domestic chaos of feeding children, dressing them, overseeing the completion of chores and practicing, etc. But, as soon as they are shuffled out the door or dropped off at school, and I have put the baby down for bed, I pull out my notebook.

"A notebook?" you may ask. "So big deal . . ."

Actually it is a big deal, because that trusty little spiral bound number is where I begin to write and write and write. I list all the items I need to logistically accomplish that day--everything that comes to mind.

And then I start to pray. Actually, like the scripture says, I begin to counsel.

"Is there anything I have forgotten to include on the list?" I ask.

I note the changes.

"Is there anything else I should consider?" I inquire.

Again, I write the response. Sometimes the answer doesn't include just logistical items, but things to consider or ponder upon in my relationships with others as well. . . Particularly my husband and children.

"What items on my list are the biggest priority today?"

I star the items He feels are most imperative.

And so the process continues, while I glean more and more and more information.

Pretty soon I have a pretty good-looking list, with a peaceful picture of what I really need to do that day, and, best of all--the preferred way to go about doing it. Inevitably after a "counselling session" like this, I can expect all sort of magical moments in my day--like the moment I hear that still, small voice in my mind that says, "You have an extra 10 minutes to spare right now. It's the perfect time for you to stop at the store and pick up a gift for Big-O's birth mother for Mothers' Day." . . . "Thank you very much," I say.

Or the moment when I hear, "The kids are doing well downstairs for a minute, now is the perfect time to call the individual I mentioned this morning." . . . "Wow," I think again. Or, "Aren't you forgetting to call and reschedule those appointments?" . . .

And the list goes on and on.

Over and over I am astounded at the degree of help I receive for things that may seem meaningless to others, but are incredibly important to me. In fact, the process is often so personal that it often brings tears to my eyes as I marvel at His awareness of me as an individual, and the love helps center me in a way that nothing else can. As I stop to consider this process, I can say with absolute certainty that God hears and answers my prayers on a daily basis.

And, most importantly, the guidance He is willing to provide is constrained only by my own limited expectations--not His.